Rule #64: When all the other kids are meeting the new teacher and saying, “Nice to meet you Ms. J.,” and shaking her hand, I wish you wouldn’t make that strange series of noises & head butt her.
I am the Meanest Mommy in the Whole Wide World. I am forced to make rules & observations that I never knew would be necessary before I became a parent.
Rules by the Meanest Mommy in the Whole Wide World 
Ms. J, this is our alien child.