Monthly Archives: September 2012

Rule #538: 5 Steps of Grieving for the Parents of Picky Eaters

5 Steps of Grieving for the Parents of Picky Eaters


  1. Denial – This is no big deal.  It’s just a phase.  I’m sure you’ll be hungrier tomorrow.  If I keep putting healthy food on your plate, you’ll eat it.
  2. Anger – Why me?  This isn’t fair!!!  Are you freaking kidding me?  You liked this exact same thing last week.  I worked really hard on this healthy meal, and YOU ARE GOING TO EAT IT!!!
  3. Bargaining – Just try it.  I’m begging you. If you try the green beans, you can have some dessert.  What about the pasta?  If you eat your pasta, you can have a sticker on your sticker chart.  And a tootsie roll.
  4. Depression – Why do I even bother making meals for you people?  Cooking for this family is the hardest job in the world.  I think I’m going to cry again.
  5. Acceptance – Just have another peanut butter sandwich, Honey.


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Rule #537

Rule #537:  Peeing on Mommy’s broccoli plants does NOT help them grow.  


 Thanks, Kristina F.


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Rule #536

Rule #536:  Spitting water out of your mouth and onto your sister is not the same as playing with water guns.  

 

 Thanks, Michelle C.

 

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Rule #535

Rule #535:  You may not get your face wet in the mall fountain.

 

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Rule #534

Rule #534:  It’s not okay, upon seeing an older woman, to yell to me across the playground, “Wow, look at how old she is! Isn’t it amazing she’s not dead yet!”


 Thanks, Kate M.


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Rule #533

Rule #533:  When I am already late and have 10 minutes to get your brother and sister to their school, you to your preschool, and me to work, it is not a good time to put my keys in the refrigerator so that they will “stay fresh,” causing me to be 15 more minutes late to work and to have to relate this story to a disbelieving and unsympathetic boss.  This applies to your brother’s shoes as well.


 Thanks, Michelle C.

 

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Rule #532

Rule #532:  You may not play the harmonica when you should be sleeping.

 

 Thanks, Melissa T.


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Rule #531

Rule #531:  It is not good manners to rub food on your face at the dinner table.


 

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