Monthly Archives: March 2012

Rule #505

Rule #505:  When I ask you to hurry, please do not throw yourself to the ground in front of strangers and scream, “Don’t push me!”  


Thanks, Amanda A.


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Rule #504

Rule #504:  You may not call 911 to complain about your mom taking your nerf gun away.  

 

Thanks, Anne M.

 

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Rule #503

Rule #503:  The toilet plunger is not a sword, and you may not hit your sister in the face with it.  


Thanks, Tiffany L.


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Rule #502

Rule #502:  It is not acceptable to comment on the size of mommies “booboos” in public.  It is even worse to tell other women that your mommy has bigger booboos than they do.  

 

Thanks, Jessica W.

 

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Rule #501

Rule #501:  It is not acceptable to cut your eyelashes with scissors.


Thanks, Jen T.


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Rule #500

Rule #500:  If you are at a friend’s house and take a big bite out of the foam on their trampoline handle, don’t try to blame it on the child who owns the trampoline.  It doesn’t take a forensic dentist to know that your friend’s extra tooth gives them a VERY distinct bite mark that could never be confused with yours.


Thanks, Beth F.


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Rule #499

Rule #499:  Please do not wipe the snot off your face with your hands.  Or your feet.


Thanks, Kimberli R.


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