Monthly Archives: March 2012
Rule #504
Rule #504: You may not call 911 to complain about your mom taking your nerf gun away.
Thanks, Anne M.
Filed under Guest rules
Rule #503
Rule #503: The toilet plunger is not a sword, and you may not hit your sister in the face with it.
Thanks, Tiffany L.
Filed under Guest rules
Rule #501
Rule #501: It is not acceptable to cut your eyelashes with scissors.
Thanks, Jen T.
Filed under Guest rules
Rule #500
Rule #500: If you are at a friend’s house and take a big bite out of the foam on their trampoline handle, don’t try to blame it on the child who owns the trampoline. It doesn’t take a forensic dentist to know that your friend’s extra tooth gives them a VERY distinct bite mark that could never be confused with yours.
Thanks, Beth F.
Filed under Guest rules
Rule #499
Rule #499: Please do not wipe the snot off your face with your hands. Or your feet.
Thanks, Kimberli R.
Filed under Guest rules
Rule #497
Rule #497: Please do not scream, “You’re not my mommy! You’re not my mommy!” as I try to pick you up from the floor of the toy store while you are having a tantrum, and then cling to me in fear when you see mall security coming.
Thanks, Andrea K. (who bravely admits, “Fortunately for me, my child has not done this. Unfortunately for my mother, I did.”)
Filed under Guest rules
Rule #496
Rule #496: You must wear underwear when playing freeze tag.
Thanks, Carrie HW.
Filed under Guest rules
Rules by the Meanest Mommy in the Whole Wide World 