Tag Archives: mean

09/14/2010 · 7:07 am

Rule #380

Rule #380: You may not lock Mommy out of the house. And, while I appreciate that you enjoy your fairy tales, when I demand that you open the door, it is totally inappropriate to respond, “Not by the hairs on my chinny chin chin!”

Thanks, Robyn H.!

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Tagged as big bad wolf, fairy tales, hair on my chinny chin chin, locked out, mean, meanest mommy, mom, parenting, rules, three little pigs

09/13/2010 · 6:00 am

Rule #379

Rule #379: Licking a pickle does not count as dinner, and therefore, does not make you eligible for dessert.

Thanks, Mike P.!

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Tagged as dessert, dinner, eat your dinner, mean, meanest mommy, mom, parenting, pickle, rules

09/10/2010 · 6:00 am

Rule #378

Rule #378: When I ask you, “What are you supposed to be doing?” the right answer will never be, “Playing with my privates.”

Thanks, Melissa T.

Filed under Guest rules

Tagged as Are you kidding me?, mean, meanest mommy, mom, parenting, privates, rules, wrong answer

09/09/2010 · 6:53 am

Rule #377

Rule #377: Perhaps I should have been more clear. You can’t even stick the fork in your OWN eye.

Thanks, Carrie HW!

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Tagged as eye, fork, It's all fun and games until someone gets an eye poked out, mean, meanest mommy, mom, ouch, parenting, rules

09/07/2010 · 9:25 am

Rule #376

Rule #376: Yelling at the top of your lungs that your sister is smothering you is not going to get you out of going to bed. Especially if she is in the kitchen with me working on her homework.

Thanks, Raini T.!

Filed under Guest rules

Tagged as Are you kidding me?, bedtime, fake tattling, mean, meanest mommy, mom, parenting, rules

09/05/2010 · 1:42 pm

Rule #375

Rule #375: It’s pronounced, “Pylon.” Not “Cone Penis.”

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Filed under GC, Guest rules

Tagged as cousins, goofy, madonna, mean, meanest mommy, mom, penis, penis cone, preschoolers, pylon

09/03/2010 · 7:35 am

Rule #374

Rule #374: When Mommy has to leave the shopping cart to take three kids into the bathroom stall at Wal-Mart and the lady in the stall next to us is really stinky, please don’t get on your hands and knees on the dirty floor, peek under the wall at the lady next door, and yell at the top of your lungs, “Eeewwwww!! It stinks in here!!” Also, please don’t encourage your little brother to join you in doing so.

Thanks, Katie A.

Filed under Guest rules

Tagged as embarrassing, gross, mean, meanest mommy, mom, parenting, rules, smelly, Wal-Mart

09/02/2010 · 6:00 am

Rule #373

Rule #373: Please do not scratch your butt with Mommy’s toothbrush.

Thanks, Kristina F.!

Filed under Guest rules

Tagged as butt, gross, itchy, mean, meanest mommy, mom, new toothbrush, parenting, rules, scratch, toothbrush

09/01/2010 · 6:00 am

Rule #372

Rule #372: Please refrain from wetting the watercolor paints by spitting on them.

Thanks, Abby G.!

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Filed under Guest rules

Tagged as gross, mean, meanest mommy, mom, parenting, rules, saliva, spit, watercolors

08/31/2010 · 6:00 am

Rule #371

Rule #371: I appreciate your efforts to be so self-sufficient about pottying, but the only appropriate places to pee are the toilet or the potty chair. Squatting over a cereal bowl isn’t much better than just peeing on the floor.

Thanks, Sarah R.!

Filed under Guest rules

Tagged as cereal bowl, don't pee in that, mean, meanest mommy, mom, parenting, pee, rules, toddler