Tag Archives: meanest mommy

Knitted Together (one of the local yarn stores) had a knitted Monster Contest. Here is the monster I entered and the related story. I was thrilled when Meanest Mommy Monster won the contest and I received $60 worth of yarn. 🙂 If you’re on Ravelry, you can look at the project here.

Mama Monster has 2 kids, 1 kid on the way, and a bad dye-job. (She tried to get the dye-job fixed, but she couldn’t find a sitter.)

Mama Monster is so highly-evolved that she has grown a third arm and a pair of eyes in the back of her head, and she has caffeine coursing through her monster veins. Despite these additional maternal features, she is still exhausted and can’t keep up with the laundry.

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Tagged as free yarn, knitted together, knitting, mean mom, meanest mommy, monster

04/29/2011 · 6:00 am

Rule #444

Rule #444: It is never okay to cover your ears and state, “Mom, please stop talking. You’re giving me an earache” or to tell me, “Mom, you are driving me up the wall.”

Thanks Jennifer E.

Rule #443

Rule #443: When I ask you to put your toys away, that does NOT mean to dump them in a pile in your brothers’ room.

Thanks, Jessica W.

1 Comment

Filed under Guest rules

Tagged as mean mom, meanest mommy, messy, parenting, pick up your toys, rules

04/27/2011 · 6:00 am

Rule #442

Rule #442: I don’t care if you were playing Survivor. You may not dig a hole in the backyard and poop in it.

Thanks, Nancy.

2 Comments

Filed under Guest rules

Tagged as gross, mean mom, meanest mommy, parenting, poop, rules, Survivor

04/26/2011 · 6:00 am

Rule #441

Rule #441: When we are swimming at Daddy’s parents’ pool and Grandma offers to take you inside to go potty because you are holding your crotch, it is not okay to try to get out of it by lying and saying, “Mommy said I don’t have to because Grandma’s bathroom is nasty.”

Thanks, Julie F.

2 Comments

Filed under Guest rules

Tagged as Don't pee in the pool, embarrassing, grandma, mean mom, meanest mommy, parenting, rules

Tag Archives: meanest mommy

Rule #449

Rule #449: While I appreciate the ability to rhyme, there’s no need to say that we’re going to “hang out, with our wang out” to everyone in the grocery store line. Especially since you’re a little girl.

Thanks, Dee G.

Rule #448

Rule #448: Please do not write in someone else’s armpit.

Thanks, Tiffany Y.

Rule #447

Rule #447: No matter what your cousin tells you, boogers do not have protein, and are not healthy treats. Please stop comparing them and talking about what good snacks they will make.

Thanks, Rebecca MA.

Rule #446

Rule #446: It’s lovely that you want to greet the pastor on Sunday morning, but standing on your father’s lap and screaming “HELLO!” in the middle of a prayer is not okay.

Thanks, Kelly H.

Rule #445

Rule #445: A rock concert is not a great place to curl into a ball on the ground and pretend to be an armadillo.

Thanks, Tara D.

Meanest Mommy Monster

Rule #444

Rule #444: It is never okay to cover your ears and state, “Mom, please stop talking. You’re giving me an earache” or to tell me, “Mom, you are driving me up the wall.”

Thanks Jennifer E.

Rule #443

Rule #443: When I ask you to put your toys away, that does NOT mean to dump them in a pile in your brothers’ room.

Thanks, Jessica W.

Rule #442

Rule #442: I don’t care if you were playing Survivor. You may not dig a hole in the backyard and poop in it.

Thanks, Nancy.

Rule #441

Rule #441: When we are swimming at Daddy’s parents’ pool and Grandma offers to take you inside to go potty because you are holding your crotch, it is not okay to try to get out of it by lying and saying, “Mommy said I don’t have to because Grandma’s bathroom is nasty.”

Thanks, Julie F.

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Tag Archives: meanest mommy

Rule #449: While I appreciate the ability to rhyme, there’s no need to say that we’re going to “hang out, with our wang out” to everyone in the grocery store line. Especially since you’re a little girl.

Thanks, Dee G.

Share this:

Rule #448: Please do not write in someone else’s armpit.

Thanks, Tiffany Y.

Share this:

Rule #447: No matter what your cousin tells you, boogers do not have protein, and are not healthy treats. Please stop comparing them and talking about what good snacks they will make.

Thanks, Rebecca MA.

Share this:

Rule #446: It’s lovely that you want to greet the pastor on Sunday morning, but standing on your father’s lap and screaming “HELLO!” in the middle of a prayer is not okay.

Thanks, Kelly H.

Share this:

Rule #445: A rock concert is not a great place to curl into a ball on the ground and pretend to be an armadillo.

Thanks, Tara D.

Share this:

Share this:

Rule #444: It is never okay to cover your ears and state, “Mom, please stop talking. You’re giving me an earache” or to tell me, “Mom, you are driving me up the wall.”

Thanks Jennifer E.

Share this:

Rule #443: When I ask you to put your toys away, that does NOT mean to dump them in a pile in your brothers’ room.

Thanks, Jessica W.

Share this:

Rule #442: I don’t care if you were playing Survivor. You may not dig a hole in the backyard and poop in it.

Thanks, Nancy.

Share this:

Rule #441: When we are swimming at Daddy’s parents’ pool and Grandma offers to take you inside to go potty because you are holding your crotch, it is not okay to try to get out of it by lying and saying, “Mommy said I don’t have to because Grandma’s bathroom is nasty.”

Thanks, Julie F.

Share this:

Meanest Mommy Knits

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Share this blog…

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