07/05/2010 · 6:00 am
Rule #349: Yes, you must wipe EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Thanks to Robyn H. who made this rule in response to this conversation with her 5 year old son:
- Mom: Don’t forget to wipe this time, Son.
- Son: I already wiped last time.
- Mom: I know you wiped last time, but you still have to wipe this time too.
- Son: But I already did before.
- Mom: If you don’t wipe every time, you will get a rash. You HAVE TO WIPE EVERY TIME YOU GO!
- Son: Every DAY even?
- Mom: Yes, son…..every time you go…..every single day…….((sigh))
- Son: GEEZ…….
07/03/2010 · 6:00 am
Rule #348: It is not acceptable to cut your hair, your dress, your curtain, the strings off your brother’s sun hat, your Barbie’s hair, and your stuffed animals’ fur during your time out. And just because Mommy left a pair of scissors in your room does not make it her fault.
Thanks, Mary B.!
07/02/2010 · 6:00 am
Rule #347: Even though it’s summertime and you don’t have to go anywhere, please do not beg for a snow cone at 9 am when I have to leave for work. Furthermore, don’t pout and be ugly when I say no. My paycheck is what pays for your snow cones!
Thanks, Maggie C.!
06/30/2010 · 6:00 am
Rule #346: Please do not pee in the shower at the Y. And if you do, please do not announce it to the crabby old ladies there.
Thankfully, this was not my child. I just overheard this conversation between a 4 year old and her horrified mom.
06/29/2010 · 6:00 am
Rule #345: You have peed on your towel. You may not lie down and cuddle with it.
Thanks, Meaghann B.!
06/28/2010 · 6:00 am
Rule #344: I know you are sad, but you are not so sad that you must remove all of your clothes and/or go live at the park.
Thanks, Jessica BB!
06/26/2010 · 9:54 am
Rule #343: Good grief, Child. When you ask for something and I say, “Yes!” please do not ask for it 85 more times in the 30 seconds it takes me to get it.
06/22/2010 · 5:51 pm
Rule #342: Please do not drink from that sippy cup you found in our playset. In June. In 90 degree F temps. Especially when Mommy is screaming, “DON’T DRINK THAT! DON’T DRINK THAT!” But I guess that’s what they call “natural consequences.”
06/17/2010 · 6:00 am
Rule #341: No arguing over whether your brother is hungry or not. If he says he is hungry, you can just believe him rather than screaming at him to attempt to convince him otherwise.
Filed under OA
Tagged as Are you kidding me?, argument, hungry, mean, meanest mommy, mom, parenting, rules, school age, summer vacation, Transferring to year round schools
06/16/2010 · 6:00 am
Rule #340: Do not blame the lunch tray for throwing away your retainer. If you can keep track of your iPod and your cell phone, you can also keep track of your retainer.
Thanks, Michele B.!
Rules by the Meanest Mommy in the Whole Wide World 