Rule #271
Rule #271: You must have a vegetable or fruit with dinner. No matter what Dad said, bacon is not a vegetable.
Thanks, Jill J.!
Filed under Guest rules
Rule #269
Rule #269: Do not tell your teacher that you feel “damn fine” or tell Grandma that her food is “damn good”. It makes mommy look bad.
Thanks, Megan S.!
Filed under Guest rules
Rule #268
Rule #268: You many not pull the dog’s teeth with your Handy Manny pliers. He needs them to eat. And by the way, the tooth fairy CAN tell the difference between dog teeth and your teeth.
Thanks, Amy W. (the Meanest Mommy of a 4 year old desperate for a visit from the Tooth Fairy and the owner of a dog who gets a nervous tic when shown the Handy Manny tools)!!
Filed under Guest rules
Rule #267
Rule #267: Please do not discuss comparative gender anatomy with strangers. Most especially, do not speculate on the size of the hotel clerk’s nipples in comparison to Daddy’s.
Thanks, Joseph E-H!
Filed under Guest rules
Rule #266
Rule #266: When we are in a crowded restaurant and I am ready to leave, you are not allowed to say “Just a sec” because without thinking, I will loudly reply, “I’m not giving you any more secs!” and that will be very awkward for me.
Thanks, Jodi P.!
Filed under Guest rules
Rule #265
Rule #265: When you choose a treat at the store, you can not turn around and ask me for a different treat because you changed your mind, AFTER you already ate the first treat you chose.
Thanks, Katie A.!
Filed under Guest rules
Rule #264
Rule #264: I know how much you like your new iPod, but that is no reason to video record every minute of our lives, including Mommy coming out of the bathroom in a towel.
Rule #263
Rule #263: When I allow you to pee standing up like Daddy, it is not okay to poop at the same time.
Thanks, Irma C.!
Filed under Guest rules
Rules by the Meanest Mommy in the Whole Wide World 