Rule #529: The training toilet seat is not a bath flotation device.
Thanks, Julianna H.
Tag Archives: rules
Rule #527
Rule #527: If you are thirsty and would like something cold to drink, please do not take a glass out of a dishwasher that has just completed its heated drying cycle. If there are no other glasses or cups to be found, at least allow the glass to cool down before pouring cold red Kool-Aid into it. If you forget all of the above and do it anyway, please tell me immediately rather than marveling at the cool science trick you just discovered while standing amidst shards of broken glass as red Kool-Aid runs off of my counter and onto my newly painted bright white cabinets.
Thanks, Michelle C.
Filed under Guest rules
Rule #526
Rule #526: When you decide to ride your bike and you change your mind halfway through, I cannot carry you AND your bike all the way back home. And throwing a tantrum in the middle of a busy street is not going to convince me.
Thanks, Jessica W.
Filed under Guest rules
Rule #525
Rule #525: Please take OUT your penis BEFORE you pee.
Thanks, Diana R.
Filed under Guest rules
Rule #524
Rule #524: No, you cannot feed your tooth to the dog.
Thanks, Misha S.
Filed under Guest rules
Rule #523
Rule #523: Using your manners does not include saying “Excuse me poop” or “Sorry poop” or even “Please pass the poop.”
Thanks, Annamarie A.
Filed under Guest rules
Rule #521
Rule #521: No, you may not have the most expensive toothpaste in the store just because a guy from your favorite boy band uses it too.
Filed under OA
Rules by the Meanest Mommy in the Whole Wide World 