Tag Archives: mean

Rule #86

Rule #86: 

NEVER.  HIDE.  MOMMY’S.  KNITTING!!!! 

Never ever ever.


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Mother’s Day Quiz

In honor of Meanest Mommy’s Mother’s Day, have your child take this quiz and see if they can score higher than my 4 year old.  He brought this home from school today.  Scroll down for Meanest Mommy’s right answers (those of you who know Meanest Mommy in real life will find this especially hilarious)….

Meanest Mommy's Day Quiz

Meanest Mommy's Day Quiz

1.  Correct.

2.  Wrong.  It’s green.

3.  Wrong and VERY wrong.  Mac & cheese is fine, but I prefer pizza or filet mignon or ice cream or cake or french fries, making the idea that I don’t like junk food seem extremely silly.

4.  Wrong.  Meanest Mommy doesn’t like Adventureland and hasn’t been there in almost 20 years.  Meanest Daddy takes the kids there sometimes.  Is the 4 yr old getting us mixed up?  Is he so excited to be at Adventureland that he doesn’t even know what grown-up is there with him?

5.  The.  Best.  Answer.  Ever.  He doesn’t know a thing about Meanest Mommy, but at least he loves her.  🙂

Sean scored 2 for 5.  He did so poorly that Olivia said, “Mom is this supposed to be about YOU?  This doesn’t describe you AT ALL!”  How does your kid score?

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Rule #85

Rule #85:  When Mom tells you no internet before she leaves the house, you can bet that she will check the temperature of all the computers when she returns and will be able to tell if any of them are warm.


Thanks to Jessica T. for coming up with the first rule for teenagers.


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Rule #84

Rule #84:  It is not safe (or comfortable or possible) for you to wear your backpack on your back while you are strapped into your carseat.  You might as well stop screaming about it.


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Rule #83

Rule #83:  Mommy forbids these things next time we are at the library…

  1. Screaming at the top of your lungs.

  2. Trying to escape and hide.

  3. Throwing puppets and puzzle pieces.

  4. Head-butting Mommy’s cheekbone until you make a bruise.

  5. Pulling down the bulletin board.


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Rule #82

Rule #82:  Yes, it is round and full of water, but that does not make it a swimming pool.

  tsbowl

tstoi

 

Thanks, Tanya S.!


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Rule #81

Rule #81:  When I’m holding 80 pounds of groceries and I gently try to move you out of the way so I can get into the house to go pee and you fall over, I would appreciate it if you didn’t tell people that I pushed you in the mud.

 

Thanks, Sherry B.!


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Rule #80

Rule #80:  Good grief child, do not stick your head under the mini-trampoline while your brother is jumping on it. Side effects include bent glasses & hurt eyebrow.


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Rule #77

Rule #77:  Just because your 9 yr old sister says that the ants will kill you doesn’t make it true.


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Rule #76

Rule #76:  FYI to the toddler…  It is not necessary for you to save up your absolute worst behavior for the following places:  the airplane, the middle school band concert, and grandma’s.

 

Thanks, Teresa S.!


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